The fallacy here is assuming planning something is draining or bad for you. It more has to do with how much you enjoy the thing. I think couples have arguments about the thing neither of them wants to do. But if one
enjoys planning the holiday for example they will just do it and it wont feel like EFT.
I definitely get bank EFT (pun not intended), I deal with this by having recurring todos with all the links and stuff I need to smash it out quickly. The idea is to offload from CPU (executive/conscious) to GPU (habits/unconscious)
When talking about this I thought EFT was going to lead to how Twitter and other dopamine hits stop you from getting important stuff done.
> The fallacy here is assuming planning something is draining or bad for you.
Executive Function is a term commonly thrown around in the autistic and ADHD spaces. When read in that context, it makes a *lot* more sense.
From what I hear, neurotypical people have a much higher tolerance for bullshit work and wasteful process. I wouldn't know what that feels like. Beyond 1 or 2 wasted steps and I get mad that someone has designed a process that's actively hostile to its users.
I don't get upset: I get stuck. Then I get upset; or I just dissociate, depending on how depressed I am at that moment.
If a task expects too much executive functioning from my ADHD brain, I literally cannot complete the task.
Of course, that sounds a lot more binary than it is: my executive functioning is a product of complex neurochemical interactions. The right balance of medication might give me enough stimulation to do the thing. Stress and adrenaline might give me enough stimulation to do the thing. I might be able to get started, but get stuck halfway through. All I can say for certain (predictably) is that my brain naturally lives below that stimulation threshold.
Years of living without medication (I was diagnosed in my late 20s) left my brain to create habits that try (and fail) to compensate. The main habit I have recognized is an obsession with objectivity: if I could just think about the problem enough to factor out the work, then I wouldn't need to do anything! The result is a collection of knowledge and understanding that isn't tied to experience or achievement. I'm still trying to get the hang of action: moving toward a goal.
Most people can't even imagine what I'm going through. For them, inconvenience is just something they live through. For me, inconvenience is the walls of an endless maze. I would very much like to leave.
They have too high a tolerance. It can take a long time to convince them of what any observer can see. That they are doing a lot of busy or low quality work that simply amplifies the busy or low quality work in the future.
People who tolerate it create the Red Queen Problem that kills so many projects. It’s the people who don’t tolerate that shit that put a stop to it.
Have you seen Avengers? As the Hulk says, "That's the secret... I'm always angry." Learning to control your anger is a life skill, one that different people have different aptitude for, but one that nobody should give up on.
I think you’re missing the assumption that planning is the “good” task, and the alternative is cleaning/chores, which generally no one wants to do.
> the other person is getting to relax or to plan a project?
Habits and subconscious thinking helps, but you do still have to do those tasks, and it does still take thought. You still have to write them down, set up todos, etc.
The idea is that cleaning/chores requires a lot of small things, that isn’t fun, but is mentally taxing. Planning meals, cooking, cleaning, tracking what needs to be cleaned next, timers, etc is the EF being “stolen”.
I definitely get bank EFT (pun not intended), I deal with this by having recurring todos with all the links and stuff I need to smash it out quickly. The idea is to offload from CPU (executive/conscious) to GPU (habits/unconscious)
When talking about this I thought EFT was going to lead to how Twitter and other dopamine hits stop you from getting important stuff done.